Joys of Caregiving
We’ve adapted to this new chapter four years after Rick’s stroke. We all have bad days, no question. In my blog posts and articles, I give voice to caregivers and care partners, as well as sharing my story. Caregivers face many challenges and are looking for support and tips to help them navigate. But it is equally important for them to know that caregiving includes joy too. I want to share some positive aspects of caregiving this week.
Time with your loved one
You were uncertain about their survival after the stroke. Despite life’s changes, you now have the extra time you weren’t expecting. You can now share and act on thoughts you never thought you could. You find joy in every day you have with your loved one.
Celebration of the small things in life.
In the past, I used to get upset by things that weren’t important. He skipped chores: no clothes pickup, no dishes, no evening plan. A health crisis shifts priorities, focusing on minor victories over daily routines. Big changes result from a series of small successes.
Focus on the present.
So many of us, including me, look to the future. “When this happens, I will be happy.” When a medical crisis occurs, you look only at the present, at what is happening now. Post crisis, I learned that focusing on the present, what today brings, allows you to enjoy life’s small joys. Worry doesn’t change what’s coming, but joy makes now better.
Spiritual Growth
It’s simple to practice your faith when things are good. We’ve all offered “I’ll pray for you” when others struggled; now you and yours need prayers. At the peak of the medical crisis, I was extremely angry at God and distanced myself. He never abandoned me. With God’s presence, we found peace, learned about suffering, and gained a joyful support group. Deeper connections bring happiness.
Having a purpose
Everyone needs to feel like their life has meaning. That they are contributing to the better good of others – this brings joy to our lives. Being a caregiver or Care Partner can be a very challenging role but also filled with joy and purpose. Helping someone with love and compassion improves their life and yours. If you weren’t here, what would happen to your loved one? Where would you be without their presence in your life?
Laugh at the challenges
Humor and laughter provide numerous health benefits for both of you. Stress relief improved immune function and enhanced mental health. When caring for another, there are times when both of you just laugh at the absurdity of your new life. From the outside, it may seem like gallows humor, but it is what keeps you and your loved one grounded on the day. We frequently joke, “You can’t use the stroke card today” or he will use his stroke as a joke when uncomfortable. Laughter is the best medicine.
Skills, you didn’t know you possessed.
As I talk to so many new caregivers, I frequently hear, no way can I care for my loved one. I am not a nurse, and then there is joy on their faces when they learn the needed skill. Life is funny. No matter how much we plan, when that changes, we find an inner strength to learn and master. Experiencing the joy of accomplishment and helping others changes everything. In a crisis, we all feel helpless, just watching. However, we can make a difference with our new skills.
New friends at support groups
This is a group nobody wants to join, yet they’ll save you when necessary. Finding joy in shared experiences, tears, and laughter with others. I’m often told that it helps to talk to someone who understands, and when I depart, they’re smiling, not feeling isolated.
Bringing families and friends closer
Time moves swiftly; before you realize it, dinner plans are old news. Your loved one experiences the same thing. It’s joyful to take part in normal daily activities. The importance of family grows during holidays and regular days. After fearing loss, you can now enjoy time you thought you’d never have. Joy stems from celebrating every day as if it were your last; it’s true.